When dating a chick with big boobs, be prepared for all of your friends and male family members to constantly give her hugs. When saying hi. When saying good bye. When they see her across the mall from 50 yards out and sprint over to say hi. When offering her the most random of congratulations. "Hey Todd's girlfriend, you got your car washed? Looks nice! Come here!" **Hugs Todd's girlfriend**

I just laughed at first. I'd been friends with these dudes for years and I've never witnessed the blatant hug shenanigans I saw. These dudes were too obvious! I'm not THAT jealous, so it was what it was. But the shit got old everytime we were leaving to go somewhere it took extra long because EVERYBODY had to get those hugs in. Those lingering, swaying, way too warm for just saying goodbye type hugs.

Anyway... You know that charred, fatty piece of grilled steak that melts so bombly in your mouth? Thats the flavor I get upon first bite of these.  Nice beefy, smoky, oniony flavor but very salty. So salty that if you eat too many without taking a break in between chips, your tastebuds get numb. The flavor is also very inconsistent from chip to chip. I don't know if that is from the accumulation of salt on my tongue or just inconsistent seasoning. Nice ruffled texture with a good crunch, but the salt and inconsistency brings these chips down. 2..75 outta 5 on the chip mack scale.

Chillin' one summer Saturday night with my Girlfriend at Miyagi's on Sunset, I'd learn a valuable lesson...be careful when being a hero. The night started innocently enough. Myself, my girlfriend, and some of her friends decided to go out. Female friends. Usually nothing good happens when you're in a club with a bunch of chicks with no male back up of your own. This is the perfect recipe to be "caught slippin'." As we enter Miyagi's, a place I've been numerous times before, I spot two giant Mexican gangster dudes ("essays") and an eeny weeny ese with tattoos all over his head and face. They definitely didn't match the environment of patrons in a West Hollywood club. Growing up around my share of "essays" and knowing I was vulnerable being with nothing but chicks, I knew I had to be aware of these dudes whereabouts at all times. A few hours pass. I'm on my fourth Long Island ice tea and all is well!  Until I see the two larger cholos back this dude and his girlfriend into a booth. Maybe it was the Long Islands, maybe it was because the dude being harrassed reminded me of my little cousin...but something told me to help this dude out. At this time, I wasn't a small dude myself so I go over, take a sip of my Long Island ice tea with one hand and wedge my other arm in between the gamma radiation affected cholos and their victim. As I pulled them off, they both immediately turn around and come after me! As I take a step back to create a safe distance, the itty bitty ese I forgot about punched me square in my eye with all his might. My drunk mind thought, pretty cool...look at all the stars and shit! It was just like what happens in cartoons! As I turn around, without ever spilling a drop of my drink might I add, I see nothing but feet and fist flying...again, just like in a cartoon!  I take another sip and watch the carnage unfold while taking an ice cube out of my drink and holding on my eye. The room cleared, and all that was left was a big puddle of blood. THEIR blood. I guess the bouncers saw what happened and were just waiting for a reason to pounce on these dudes. I continued to drink the same drink I had in my hand throughout the confrontation and resumed my parlayin'. Wherever you are guy-getting-harassed-by-giant-essays...you owe me a drink.

Anyway, these Greektown Gyro chips are nasty and kinda good. Upon first bite, there is a very unpleasant taste of lamb. That gamey, nasty lamb taste that I know all too well. I love gyros, but the lamb is ususlly perfectly seasoned to eliminate any gamey-ness. Once you get past the nasty lamb flavor, the supporting flavors of tomato, onion, and a mild yogurt flavor make their appearance in the background. Once you eat a few, the lamb flavor gets somewhat subdued, making these more palatable. The kettle chip texture is nice, but that damn lamb flavor is hard to get over.  The tzatziki flavored Lay's chips are great. These, not so much. 2.5 outta 5 on the chip mack scale.